Tuesday, February 24, 2009
So, I've discovered this thing called Twitter that basically gives people a status update. I'll try to post little blurbs often, and they'll show up on the right hand of this page. I'll still try to post regularly, but this will give me a chance to mention stuff without feeling like I need to put a whole lot of time into a full-fledged post.
Japan-US Relations
I don't know why I let the differences between Japan and America get to me, but I do. This past weekend, our cell phone service got shut off. When I signed the contract, I asked how I could pay my bill. They asked for my postal bank account number and told me that the bill would automatically come out of my account each month. What they failed to tell me was that automatic payments take two months to establish in Japan.
Up until three days ago, I hadn't received any kind of bill or notice of payment. Every time I checked my account statement, I wondered why the money hadn't yet come out. Three days ago, I got January's bill in the mail. The next day, my service was shut off. When I contacted the phone company today, they agreed to turn on my cell phone service and apologized for any confusion.
I asked about December's bill and wondered why it never came. The bills come pre-printed with the amount paid, so you can't pay two months' bills at a time. They told me that they sent December's bill two weeks ago, and that I had before the end of month to pay or they'd shut the phones off again. I went to the post office to pay January's bill, with the hope that I could pay December's as well. No such luck.
Here in Japan, you have to have a physical copy of a bill if you want to pay it. There is no online bill pay. There is no option to pay by phone with a debit or credit card. You can set up automatic payment from an account, but you have to fill out forms (without making any mistakes). When I asked the post office clerk to help me, we ended up on the phone again with the phone company, verifying exactly what they had already told me. They're resending the bill that never came so that I can have a physical copy to take into an office to pay.
I've always paid my bills early. If I pay them while I still have money, I don't have to worry about not being able to pay my bills later. It's so frustrating that I have to wait weeks or months just to give them money. It's archaic and it's arcane. It's archanic. I just want to pay my bill! The problem is, most people here don't ask questions. They just pay. They fill out the paperwork, wait in the lines, go through the motions, and never demand that things be made easier or more user-friendly. On one hand, I understand that I need to develop more patience for these sorts of things. On the other hand, I wonder why I should have to develop patience for something as trivial as paying a bill. Don't I have more important things to worry about?
When we set up the apartment in Matsuyama, the church helped pay for the rent. We said that we were willing to pay a certain amount, so they told us to transfer the money whenever we could. We now are able to make that transfer, but they won't let me! I called the Branch President, and he said not to worry about it until April. The problem is, the only way I won't stress about outstanding debts and bills is if they've been paid! Now, we'll have an untouchable chunk of money in our account for six weeks, giving us a false sense of financial security. Why can't I just pay it now? Where else in the world would a debtor not be allowed to pay his debts? Consider my mind boggled. So, I'll try to put it out of my mind. But I won't rest easy until our debts are settled.
Mia's getting big--she's out of the incubator now. It's great to see her in her bassinet, without all the tubes and everything. She's up to 4 pounds now, and she's really starting to fill out. I think she looks a lot like Kelsey did when she was born, except that she seems to have lighter hair and blue eyes. We'll be excited if they stay blue.
Yesterday, they told us that she could start breast feeding, but that we had to go out and buy some sterilizing wipes. If they had given us any sort of heads-up, we could have been prepared. Instead, Stef had to fit one more stop into her already packed schedule. Stuff like that could easily be avoided if people were just more willing to communicate with us.
We're anticipating her release from the hospital in three weeks or so. We still don't know where we're going to live. We think we're taking Kitt's place, but nobody's been able to confirm anything. I have yet to be contacted by my new contracting organization. It'd be nice to know where we're going to live so that we can prepare the place. We're even willing to pay the full month's rent, even if we only live there for a week or two in March. From what I gather, I probably won't get a call until the day before I'm supposed to be there. Because moving obviously doesn't take time.
Most Japanese people seem to be unwilling to engage in any sort of speculation. Doctor Nagai said that the Japanese way is to only say what has been confirmed, so as to not create false expectations. In other words, they could lose face if they speculated on something and it turned out to be slightly different. When we inquired about the start date of breast feeding, the doctors tiptoed around our question. Instead of saying something like, "Once she's at a stable weight--say, 1800 grams--and is able to be moved from the incubator to a bassinet, we'll try", they said, "Once she's healthy enough." We don't need exact figures--just estimates that we can use to set realistic expectations and prepare for the future. I'm not going to sue you if things turn out differently. It's okay if they're not sure where they'll place me yet--just tell me that.
In addition to Adult English conversation classes, I've started teaching internet classes once a week. After fixing my boss' computer a couple weeks ago, I'm now seen as the computer whiz on the island. I admit it's a bit tough to motivate myself to help him now, since I've learned that my effort led to him having a computer that's fast enough to load adult web sites. Last week, for the first lesson, two 60-70 year old men came. They were more excited to read haiku and see pictures of themselves on the town website than anything else. That's a lot easier on my conscience than the stuff my boss wanted to look at. I was pretty stressed about the class at first, but it turned out to be pretty relaxed.
Kelsey's struggling with the long distance fathering. It breaks my heart to hear that she cries for me while I'm away, or that she looks for me when she wakes up, only to remember where I am and announce to the world, "Daddy's working. Island." I miss all my girls terribly. But there's only a few more weeks of this. It'll all be over soon.
Kelsey's getting a lot better at speaking. All the cute "one" words (water = wa-one, pillow = pih-one, towel = tow-one) now sound pretty close to how they should. She still says some things in a cute/wrong way, like fishy tatters (instead of fishy crackers). When we would arrive at the store, Jusco, Kelsey used to shout, "Home!" After telling her that Jusco is not home, but a store, she would shake her head and say, "Not home." We told her the store was called Jusco, and she now calls it "Jus-Home." But for the most part, her English is getting really good. When Stef leaves to see Mia, Kelsey says, "Mommy's seeing Mia. Kelsey's playing nurse." When Stef gets back, she says, "Mommy saw Mia." That's pretty advanced stuff.
I mentioned earlier that Kelsey comes up with her own plans, like when we tell her that she has to hold someone's hand and she elects to hold "Kelsey's hand." The other day, in an attempt to get Kelsey ready to go to the hospital, Stef gave her two options: we could take the bikes or take the stroller. Kelsey replied, "No. Take the bus." Her responses blow me away sometimes.
Life is good. We have our sources of stress, but truthfully, we feel pretty blessed. We were interviewed by a camera crew from NHK, the public broadcasting station in Japan that's famous for news coverage. They came to the hospital to ask us some questions about Mia's birth and our hospital experience. It's set to air March 10th. I'll get a copy and post it on YouTube for everyone to see.
Up until three days ago, I hadn't received any kind of bill or notice of payment. Every time I checked my account statement, I wondered why the money hadn't yet come out. Three days ago, I got January's bill in the mail. The next day, my service was shut off. When I contacted the phone company today, they agreed to turn on my cell phone service and apologized for any confusion.
I asked about December's bill and wondered why it never came. The bills come pre-printed with the amount paid, so you can't pay two months' bills at a time. They told me that they sent December's bill two weeks ago, and that I had before the end of month to pay or they'd shut the phones off again. I went to the post office to pay January's bill, with the hope that I could pay December's as well. No such luck.
Here in Japan, you have to have a physical copy of a bill if you want to pay it. There is no online bill pay. There is no option to pay by phone with a debit or credit card. You can set up automatic payment from an account, but you have to fill out forms (without making any mistakes). When I asked the post office clerk to help me, we ended up on the phone again with the phone company, verifying exactly what they had already told me. They're resending the bill that never came so that I can have a physical copy to take into an office to pay.
I've always paid my bills early. If I pay them while I still have money, I don't have to worry about not being able to pay my bills later. It's so frustrating that I have to wait weeks or months just to give them money. It's archaic and it's arcane. It's archanic. I just want to pay my bill! The problem is, most people here don't ask questions. They just pay. They fill out the paperwork, wait in the lines, go through the motions, and never demand that things be made easier or more user-friendly. On one hand, I understand that I need to develop more patience for these sorts of things. On the other hand, I wonder why I should have to develop patience for something as trivial as paying a bill. Don't I have more important things to worry about?
When we set up the apartment in Matsuyama, the church helped pay for the rent. We said that we were willing to pay a certain amount, so they told us to transfer the money whenever we could. We now are able to make that transfer, but they won't let me! I called the Branch President, and he said not to worry about it until April. The problem is, the only way I won't stress about outstanding debts and bills is if they've been paid! Now, we'll have an untouchable chunk of money in our account for six weeks, giving us a false sense of financial security. Why can't I just pay it now? Where else in the world would a debtor not be allowed to pay his debts? Consider my mind boggled. So, I'll try to put it out of my mind. But I won't rest easy until our debts are settled.
Mia's getting big--she's out of the incubator now. It's great to see her in her bassinet, without all the tubes and everything. She's up to 4 pounds now, and she's really starting to fill out. I think she looks a lot like Kelsey did when she was born, except that she seems to have lighter hair and blue eyes. We'll be excited if they stay blue.
Yesterday, they told us that she could start breast feeding, but that we had to go out and buy some sterilizing wipes. If they had given us any sort of heads-up, we could have been prepared. Instead, Stef had to fit one more stop into her already packed schedule. Stuff like that could easily be avoided if people were just more willing to communicate with us.
We're anticipating her release from the hospital in three weeks or so. We still don't know where we're going to live. We think we're taking Kitt's place, but nobody's been able to confirm anything. I have yet to be contacted by my new contracting organization. It'd be nice to know where we're going to live so that we can prepare the place. We're even willing to pay the full month's rent, even if we only live there for a week or two in March. From what I gather, I probably won't get a call until the day before I'm supposed to be there. Because moving obviously doesn't take time.
Most Japanese people seem to be unwilling to engage in any sort of speculation. Doctor Nagai said that the Japanese way is to only say what has been confirmed, so as to not create false expectations. In other words, they could lose face if they speculated on something and it turned out to be slightly different. When we inquired about the start date of breast feeding, the doctors tiptoed around our question. Instead of saying something like, "Once she's at a stable weight--say, 1800 grams--and is able to be moved from the incubator to a bassinet, we'll try", they said, "Once she's healthy enough." We don't need exact figures--just estimates that we can use to set realistic expectations and prepare for the future. I'm not going to sue you if things turn out differently. It's okay if they're not sure where they'll place me yet--just tell me that.
In addition to Adult English conversation classes, I've started teaching internet classes once a week. After fixing my boss' computer a couple weeks ago, I'm now seen as the computer whiz on the island. I admit it's a bit tough to motivate myself to help him now, since I've learned that my effort led to him having a computer that's fast enough to load adult web sites. Last week, for the first lesson, two 60-70 year old men came. They were more excited to read haiku and see pictures of themselves on the town website than anything else. That's a lot easier on my conscience than the stuff my boss wanted to look at. I was pretty stressed about the class at first, but it turned out to be pretty relaxed.
Kelsey's struggling with the long distance fathering. It breaks my heart to hear that she cries for me while I'm away, or that she looks for me when she wakes up, only to remember where I am and announce to the world, "Daddy's working. Island." I miss all my girls terribly. But there's only a few more weeks of this. It'll all be over soon.
Kelsey's getting a lot better at speaking. All the cute "one" words (water = wa-one, pillow = pih-one, towel = tow-one) now sound pretty close to how they should. She still says some things in a cute/wrong way, like fishy tatters (instead of fishy crackers). When we would arrive at the store, Jusco, Kelsey used to shout, "Home!" After telling her that Jusco is not home, but a store, she would shake her head and say, "Not home." We told her the store was called Jusco, and she now calls it "Jus-Home." But for the most part, her English is getting really good. When Stef leaves to see Mia, Kelsey says, "Mommy's seeing Mia. Kelsey's playing nurse." When Stef gets back, she says, "Mommy saw Mia." That's pretty advanced stuff.
I mentioned earlier that Kelsey comes up with her own plans, like when we tell her that she has to hold someone's hand and she elects to hold "Kelsey's hand." The other day, in an attempt to get Kelsey ready to go to the hospital, Stef gave her two options: we could take the bikes or take the stroller. Kelsey replied, "No. Take the bus." Her responses blow me away sometimes.
Life is good. We have our sources of stress, but truthfully, we feel pretty blessed. We were interviewed by a camera crew from NHK, the public broadcasting station in Japan that's famous for news coverage. They came to the hospital to ask us some questions about Mia's birth and our hospital experience. It's set to air March 10th. I'll get a copy and post it on YouTube for everyone to see.
Sunday, February 22, 2009
New pics of Mia
Here are the most recent pics of Mia (and one of Kelsey playing with the nurse), taken yesterday.
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
25 Random Facts About Me
I figured I'd post this blurb from my facebook for everyone else to see. There's this "tag" game, where someone tags you, and you're supposed to make a list of 25 things about yourself, and then tag 25 other people. I normally hate making these lists, but I figured that the only way I could avoid future tags is by posting this now.
1. This is the third time I've been asked to do this, and I'm only getting around to it now because my wife asked me to. Sweet, only #24 more to go.
2. I'm really good at embarassing myself. No, not in the Spanish way.
3. Oh yeah, I'm fluent in Spanish and am learning Japanese. I can get by in Portuguese.
4. I want to learn German some day. And pretty much every other language.
5. I got hit by a car and died when I was 3 years old.
6. I'm such a goof that people often think I'm joking when I'm being serious. Yes, #5 did happen. My dad gave me a blessing and I started breathing again.
7. I got hit by a semi truck in my car (it hit me three times) when I was 19. It's a miracle that I'm still alive.
8. I teach English on a remote island in Japan. There are fewer than 200 people on the island, and I only have 5 students.
9. I have a competitive streak (read: bad temper) when I play games with people. I avoid games that require strategy, because I get too emotionally invested into them. I'm a lot more fun to be around when people aren't being competitive.
10. I hate working out, and can't understand why people think it's fun. The only way I can get myself to work out is if the exercise is hidden within some kind of competition, like with basketball.
11. I have a knack for noticing when other people aren't being tactful, but usually fail in my own attempts.
12. I'm an elitist when it comes to music. I don't like it if I think I could write it myself. Lyrics, while important, take a back seat to awesome harmony and innovative melodies. I hate poetry and songs that feel the need to tightly rhyme on the last word of each line (I wanna die, you make me wanna cry, I want some pie, I'm gonna sigh, etc.).
13. I think that cell phones are destroying the English language. "Your" is not the same as "you're". It's "couldn't care less", not "could care less". And it's "miss-chih-vus", not "miss-cheevy-us".
14. I'm so confident in my masculinity that I often make semi-veiled sexual advances at friends named Ryan.
15. I'm usually the tallest guy on the basketball team, but I like to shoot three-pointers. I shoot better from outside the arc than I do from inside. Yeah, I'm pretty awesome. No big deal.
16. I have the coolest wife in the world. She was willing to come to a remote island in a strange country with me, even though she was pregnant.
17. I watched my wife give birth 14 weeks early on a small boat in the middle of the night in the middle of the sea.
18. I love isolation, as long as my family is with me. But I also love being in small groups of people, because I like to make people laugh.
19. I hated high school. I was too nerdy for the cool people and too cool for the nerds. The only reason I'd ever consider going to a high school reunion would be to rub my successes into other peoples' faces. But that would be bad form.
20. As much as I love being around my family, I couldn't live in Orangevale. It's not about them--I just feel like everything worthwhile that I've ever done was away from Orangevale. Going back brings back feelings of discomfort and insecurity. People back there don't know the real me, and never did.
21. I didn't try out for the basketball team because of insecurities about my physique. But now I'm proud of my moobies.
22. I may be the youngest person ever with BPH. Large prostate = me having to pee every 2-3 hours (sometimes every hour). I've slept through the night maybe three or four times in the last 10 years.
23. I have a photographic memory for things that don't matter. I remember minute details, phone numbers, addresses, other peoples' account numbers, names (to go with faces). However, I can't, for the life of me, remember things that are important. Like taking out the trash. Or to wash the dishes. I just don't think about those things. I'm more than willing to do them most of the time. I just need a little, "Hey, could you do the dishes?"
24. I'm an extremely disorganized person. My desk is always messy, as is my dresser. My thoughts are usually somewhat jumbled.
25. I'm extremely persistent with repetitive tasks. I'm willing to trudge through the monotony that others aren't. If I get on a cleaning kick, I won't stop until whatever I'm cleaning is spotless. If I'm fixing a computer or an Xbox, or organizing mp3s, or trying to hit a sales goal, I will not stop until I have achieved my goal.
1. This is the third time I've been asked to do this, and I'm only getting around to it now because my wife asked me to. Sweet, only #24 more to go.
2. I'm really good at embarassing myself. No, not in the Spanish way.
3. Oh yeah, I'm fluent in Spanish and am learning Japanese. I can get by in Portuguese.
4. I want to learn German some day. And pretty much every other language.
5. I got hit by a car and died when I was 3 years old.
6. I'm such a goof that people often think I'm joking when I'm being serious. Yes, #5 did happen. My dad gave me a blessing and I started breathing again.
7. I got hit by a semi truck in my car (it hit me three times) when I was 19. It's a miracle that I'm still alive.
8. I teach English on a remote island in Japan. There are fewer than 200 people on the island, and I only have 5 students.
9. I have a competitive streak (read: bad temper) when I play games with people. I avoid games that require strategy, because I get too emotionally invested into them. I'm a lot more fun to be around when people aren't being competitive.
10. I hate working out, and can't understand why people think it's fun. The only way I can get myself to work out is if the exercise is hidden within some kind of competition, like with basketball.
11. I have a knack for noticing when other people aren't being tactful, but usually fail in my own attempts.
12. I'm an elitist when it comes to music. I don't like it if I think I could write it myself. Lyrics, while important, take a back seat to awesome harmony and innovative melodies. I hate poetry and songs that feel the need to tightly rhyme on the last word of each line (I wanna die, you make me wanna cry, I want some pie, I'm gonna sigh, etc.).
13. I think that cell phones are destroying the English language. "Your" is not the same as "you're". It's "couldn't care less", not "could care less". And it's "miss-chih-vus", not "miss-cheevy-us".
14. I'm so confident in my masculinity that I often make semi-veiled sexual advances at friends named Ryan.
15. I'm usually the tallest guy on the basketball team, but I like to shoot three-pointers. I shoot better from outside the arc than I do from inside. Yeah, I'm pretty awesome. No big deal.
16. I have the coolest wife in the world. She was willing to come to a remote island in a strange country with me, even though she was pregnant.
17. I watched my wife give birth 14 weeks early on a small boat in the middle of the night in the middle of the sea.
18. I love isolation, as long as my family is with me. But I also love being in small groups of people, because I like to make people laugh.
19. I hated high school. I was too nerdy for the cool people and too cool for the nerds. The only reason I'd ever consider going to a high school reunion would be to rub my successes into other peoples' faces. But that would be bad form.
20. As much as I love being around my family, I couldn't live in Orangevale. It's not about them--I just feel like everything worthwhile that I've ever done was away from Orangevale. Going back brings back feelings of discomfort and insecurity. People back there don't know the real me, and never did.
21. I didn't try out for the basketball team because of insecurities about my physique. But now I'm proud of my moobies.
22. I may be the youngest person ever with BPH. Large prostate = me having to pee every 2-3 hours (sometimes every hour). I've slept through the night maybe three or four times in the last 10 years.
23. I have a photographic memory for things that don't matter. I remember minute details, phone numbers, addresses, other peoples' account numbers, names (to go with faces). However, I can't, for the life of me, remember things that are important. Like taking out the trash. Or to wash the dishes. I just don't think about those things. I'm more than willing to do them most of the time. I just need a little, "Hey, could you do the dishes?"
24. I'm an extremely disorganized person. My desk is always messy, as is my dresser. My thoughts are usually somewhat jumbled.
25. I'm extremely persistent with repetitive tasks. I'm willing to trudge through the monotony that others aren't. If I get on a cleaning kick, I won't stop until whatever I'm cleaning is spotless. If I'm fixing a computer or an Xbox, or organizing mp3s, or trying to hit a sales goal, I will not stop until I have achieved my goal.
Sunday, January 25, 2009
Hisashiburi desu ne! It's been a while.
It's about time for another post. First, I want to update everyone on Mia's situation. Mia's got a hole in her heart which, while not life-threatening, requires her heart to work extra hard in order to pump blood through her body. Whenever she undergoes any kind of stress, her heart rate jumps up into uncomfortable levels. The hole might heal on its own, and it might not. If it doesn't, they may need to perform surgery when she's about 5 or 6 so that she doesn't have heart failure near the age of 30. It's nothing pressing, but we pray it will heal so she can have a healthy, normal life.
They are not yet sure if she'll need laser eye surgery to help the blood vessels expand to the outer edges of her eye. It might take care of itself.
The last time I checked, her weight was up to 1150 grams. That's about 2 1/2 pounds. We were looking forward to the 1600 gram mark, because we figured that we'd be able to start holding her around then. Stef has been anxious to start Kangaroo Care. Baby kangaroos are born quite underdeveloped. They continue their development outside the womb in the pouch, where they get to spend a lot of time skin-to-skin with their mothers. Premature babies are a lot stronger when they get to spend time skin-to-skin with mom. We were told that Mia had to be strong enough to breathe without the help of a respirator.
While she has been strong enough to breathe on her own for a while, her oxygen level in her blood would go down when they took her off the respirator. The nurses have been taking the respirator off for a half-hour at a time to see how she does. She's gotten better and better at keeping her heart rate normal and oxygen saturation levels above 90 (usually around 95) when she's off the respirator. We finally get to see her without a mask every once-in-a-while.
Yesterday, during Sunday School, I got a call from the hospital. I was a bit worried at first, but they were calling to let Stef know that she could start Kangaroo Care. I was so excited to tell her. So, Stef got to hold Mia up against her chest for the first time. For now, she can do that every day from 12:30 until 1. Once Mia's up to about 1600 grams (I believe), she should be strong enough to stay out of the incubator without little electrodes on her back and foot. She's doing very well. We're so grateful for all the prayers on her behalf.
Life has been a whirlwind since Mia was born. I've had piles of forms to fill out and countless meetings with doctors and town hall workers. Every few weeks we meet with my supervisor, the doctors, and a translator from the prefectural office. At first, I was a bit wary of having the prefectural translators help out. After all, the church members had been helpful enough, and the translators might have contributed to us getting kicked out of Grant and Etta's apartment. One of the translators, Murakami-san, was very kind and understanding of our situation, so we decided to go ahead and have him translate for us. That turned out to be a fantastic decision.
Right now, I work during the week and make the 4-5 hour journey to Matsuyama every Friday night to be with Stef and Kelsey. My board of education has shuffled my schedule so that I can work Tuesday through Friday and be with the fam until Monday afternoon. My mom's been with Stef for about 3 weeks, and that's lightened Stef's load considerably on the days I'm not there. We still miss each other terribly, but at least she's got someone to keep her company during the week. Mom goes home in a little over a week, so things are going to get a bit tougher for Stef.
Before Mia was born, we visited Kitt, one of the JETs in Imabari (where we went to church before we moved to Matsuyama). We commented on how convenient it was and how much easier life would be if we were there. Stefanie and I were very worried about bringing Mia back to Uoshima. Since Uoshima is so scarily inconvenient for newborns, we were considering moving Stef, Mia, and Kelsey to Imabari after Mia gets released from the hospital. I would go to Imabari on weekends after working in Uoshima all week. In the meantime, we'd see about getting transferred to a place with a hospital. The JET Program is usually pretty strict about transfers. It's difficult to get a transfer, and we'd have to wait until the end of July to do so. We were gearing up for some pretty difficult times the next few months.
Then Murakami-san mentioned something. He asked us if we were considering a transfer. We told him that we wanted to be closer to a hospital, but that we had heard about JET's strict transfer policy. We asked if it was possible, and he said that transfers were approved in extreme cases, and that he was the one in charge of transfers in Ehime. We told him that we'd love him to pursue a transfer, if possible. He said that he couldn't promise anything, and would get back to us when he knew for sure.
Stef and I went on with life, praying that things would work out. One day, one of my JET friends sent me an instant message, mentioning Kitt wasn't renewing her contract. When I e-mailed Kitt to find out why, she told me that she was leaving right away. Even though I felt bad that her Japan experience didn't work out, I was excited about an opening for next year in Imabari.
Then, one day, my boss asked me if I would be willing to move to Imabari in April if the opportunity presented itself. Murakami-san had contacted my boss and asked if I would be willing to take Kitt's spot. I obviously approved of the move, but they told me not to get my hopes up. Uoshima paid a lot of money for me to come there, and it wasn't likely that they'd just let me go. It also wasn't a given that Imabari would take me. I mentioned all this to Kitt, and she told me that she suspected that something was up. Her boss was okay with her leaving mid-year, which is almost unheard of. I got excited. But weeks passed, and every time I asked my boss for more information, he told me that he hadn't heard anything and that it was bad to speculate.
We set up a meeting with the doctors, Murakami-san, and my boss, to discuss Mia's health. After going through the details of Mia's health, the doctors left and we had some time to ask Murakami-san some questions. Stef expressed her concern about having to care for Mia and Kelsey on Uoshima, and asked Murakami-san if he had heard anything about our transfer. He said that they were currently monitoring the surrounding areas for openings, and that they would let us know if anything came up. He asked if we had a preference between Imabari and Matsuyama. We mentioned that we had been told that it was bad to specify a preference, and he asked us, unofficially, what our preference was. I suspected that they were already trying to set something up with Imabari, so I mentioned that we'd prefer to go there, since we know people and rent is cheaper. After that, he didn't mention Matsuyama again. But he had plenty of questions about us living in Imabari. It was clear that, while he couldn't tell us anything until it was official, they were trying to move us there.
This past week, I had a JET seminar in Matsuyama with other JETs and a handful of native Japanese teachers from all over Ehime. During one of the workshops, a Japanese man came up to me and asked me if I was the one that was going to move to Imabari and start working at his school. When I said that I hadn't heard anything official, he backpedaled. Realizing he shouldn't have said anything, he said that he hoped that it would work out, and said that it was just between the two of us. Finally, unofficial confirmation! Or so I thought.
I called my boss and mentioned the run-in, and asked if he'd heard anything. He scolded me for talking about it, and said that he still hadn't heard anything. A few days later, my boss called to tell me that both boards of education had approved the transfer and that I would transfer in April, not July. The Japanese school year starts in April and goes until March. I'll finish out the school year here in Uoshima, and then we'll move to Imabari. We think we'll be taking Kitt's place in her apartment, but we're not yet sure.
We're very excited. Even though rent's more expensive in Imabari than in Uoshima, we won't have to spend 400 bucks a month on travel for church. Stef will have a lot more things to do with Kelsey and Mia, and we'll be closer to a hospital. We can't help but thank God for the way He's taken care of us through all this. We find it strangely coincidental that Kitt is leaving now, and that she happens to live in a place where we openly longed to live. Things will still be tough for the next couple months, but we're so hopeful for the future and what it brings.
Kelsey is really starting to become a handful. She is incredibly bold (to the point of our heads a-sploding). She doesn't listen to us all the time, and can throw a tantrum with the best of them. But she's also really cute. When we're walking with her and want to keep her close, we ask her to hold either Mommy's hand or Daddy's hand. She puts one hand over the other and says, "Kelsey's hand." She likes to announce to the world what's going on around her. For example, when Stef starts pumping milk, Kelsey shouts, "Mommy! Pumping!" And just in case we didn't know, she adds, "Kelsey! No pumping! Daddy! No pumping! Gamma! No pumping!" When Stef finishes pumping, it's, "Mommy! All done! Pumping!" Grandma says that she's going to be an announcer when she grows up. I figure she'll be a sportscaster for weight lifting competitions--"Krzyzvsky! All done! Pumping! Iron!"
To finish up, here's a little video of her in Stef's boots.
They are not yet sure if she'll need laser eye surgery to help the blood vessels expand to the outer edges of her eye. It might take care of itself.
The last time I checked, her weight was up to 1150 grams. That's about 2 1/2 pounds. We were looking forward to the 1600 gram mark, because we figured that we'd be able to start holding her around then. Stef has been anxious to start Kangaroo Care. Baby kangaroos are born quite underdeveloped. They continue their development outside the womb in the pouch, where they get to spend a lot of time skin-to-skin with their mothers. Premature babies are a lot stronger when they get to spend time skin-to-skin with mom. We were told that Mia had to be strong enough to breathe without the help of a respirator.
While she has been strong enough to breathe on her own for a while, her oxygen level in her blood would go down when they took her off the respirator. The nurses have been taking the respirator off for a half-hour at a time to see how she does. She's gotten better and better at keeping her heart rate normal and oxygen saturation levels above 90 (usually around 95) when she's off the respirator. We finally get to see her without a mask every once-in-a-while.
Yesterday, during Sunday School, I got a call from the hospital. I was a bit worried at first, but they were calling to let Stef know that she could start Kangaroo Care. I was so excited to tell her. So, Stef got to hold Mia up against her chest for the first time. For now, she can do that every day from 12:30 until 1. Once Mia's up to about 1600 grams (I believe), she should be strong enough to stay out of the incubator without little electrodes on her back and foot. She's doing very well. We're so grateful for all the prayers on her behalf.
Life has been a whirlwind since Mia was born. I've had piles of forms to fill out and countless meetings with doctors and town hall workers. Every few weeks we meet with my supervisor, the doctors, and a translator from the prefectural office. At first, I was a bit wary of having the prefectural translators help out. After all, the church members had been helpful enough, and the translators might have contributed to us getting kicked out of Grant and Etta's apartment. One of the translators, Murakami-san, was very kind and understanding of our situation, so we decided to go ahead and have him translate for us. That turned out to be a fantastic decision.
Right now, I work during the week and make the 4-5 hour journey to Matsuyama every Friday night to be with Stef and Kelsey. My board of education has shuffled my schedule so that I can work Tuesday through Friday and be with the fam until Monday afternoon. My mom's been with Stef for about 3 weeks, and that's lightened Stef's load considerably on the days I'm not there. We still miss each other terribly, but at least she's got someone to keep her company during the week. Mom goes home in a little over a week, so things are going to get a bit tougher for Stef.
Before Mia was born, we visited Kitt, one of the JETs in Imabari (where we went to church before we moved to Matsuyama). We commented on how convenient it was and how much easier life would be if we were there. Stefanie and I were very worried about bringing Mia back to Uoshima. Since Uoshima is so scarily inconvenient for newborns, we were considering moving Stef, Mia, and Kelsey to Imabari after Mia gets released from the hospital. I would go to Imabari on weekends after working in Uoshima all week. In the meantime, we'd see about getting transferred to a place with a hospital. The JET Program is usually pretty strict about transfers. It's difficult to get a transfer, and we'd have to wait until the end of July to do so. We were gearing up for some pretty difficult times the next few months.
Then Murakami-san mentioned something. He asked us if we were considering a transfer. We told him that we wanted to be closer to a hospital, but that we had heard about JET's strict transfer policy. We asked if it was possible, and he said that transfers were approved in extreme cases, and that he was the one in charge of transfers in Ehime. We told him that we'd love him to pursue a transfer, if possible. He said that he couldn't promise anything, and would get back to us when he knew for sure.
Stef and I went on with life, praying that things would work out. One day, one of my JET friends sent me an instant message, mentioning Kitt wasn't renewing her contract. When I e-mailed Kitt to find out why, she told me that she was leaving right away. Even though I felt bad that her Japan experience didn't work out, I was excited about an opening for next year in Imabari.
Then, one day, my boss asked me if I would be willing to move to Imabari in April if the opportunity presented itself. Murakami-san had contacted my boss and asked if I would be willing to take Kitt's spot. I obviously approved of the move, but they told me not to get my hopes up. Uoshima paid a lot of money for me to come there, and it wasn't likely that they'd just let me go. It also wasn't a given that Imabari would take me. I mentioned all this to Kitt, and she told me that she suspected that something was up. Her boss was okay with her leaving mid-year, which is almost unheard of. I got excited. But weeks passed, and every time I asked my boss for more information, he told me that he hadn't heard anything and that it was bad to speculate.
We set up a meeting with the doctors, Murakami-san, and my boss, to discuss Mia's health. After going through the details of Mia's health, the doctors left and we had some time to ask Murakami-san some questions. Stef expressed her concern about having to care for Mia and Kelsey on Uoshima, and asked Murakami-san if he had heard anything about our transfer. He said that they were currently monitoring the surrounding areas for openings, and that they would let us know if anything came up. He asked if we had a preference between Imabari and Matsuyama. We mentioned that we had been told that it was bad to specify a preference, and he asked us, unofficially, what our preference was. I suspected that they were already trying to set something up with Imabari, so I mentioned that we'd prefer to go there, since we know people and rent is cheaper. After that, he didn't mention Matsuyama again. But he had plenty of questions about us living in Imabari. It was clear that, while he couldn't tell us anything until it was official, they were trying to move us there.
This past week, I had a JET seminar in Matsuyama with other JETs and a handful of native Japanese teachers from all over Ehime. During one of the workshops, a Japanese man came up to me and asked me if I was the one that was going to move to Imabari and start working at his school. When I said that I hadn't heard anything official, he backpedaled. Realizing he shouldn't have said anything, he said that he hoped that it would work out, and said that it was just between the two of us. Finally, unofficial confirmation! Or so I thought.
I called my boss and mentioned the run-in, and asked if he'd heard anything. He scolded me for talking about it, and said that he still hadn't heard anything. A few days later, my boss called to tell me that both boards of education had approved the transfer and that I would transfer in April, not July. The Japanese school year starts in April and goes until March. I'll finish out the school year here in Uoshima, and then we'll move to Imabari. We think we'll be taking Kitt's place in her apartment, but we're not yet sure.
We're very excited. Even though rent's more expensive in Imabari than in Uoshima, we won't have to spend 400 bucks a month on travel for church. Stef will have a lot more things to do with Kelsey and Mia, and we'll be closer to a hospital. We can't help but thank God for the way He's taken care of us through all this. We find it strangely coincidental that Kitt is leaving now, and that she happens to live in a place where we openly longed to live. Things will still be tough for the next couple months, but we're so hopeful for the future and what it brings.
Kelsey is really starting to become a handful. She is incredibly bold (to the point of our heads a-sploding). She doesn't listen to us all the time, and can throw a tantrum with the best of them. But she's also really cute. When we're walking with her and want to keep her close, we ask her to hold either Mommy's hand or Daddy's hand. She puts one hand over the other and says, "Kelsey's hand." She likes to announce to the world what's going on around her. For example, when Stef starts pumping milk, Kelsey shouts, "Mommy! Pumping!" And just in case we didn't know, she adds, "Kelsey! No pumping! Daddy! No pumping! Gamma! No pumping!" When Stef finishes pumping, it's, "Mommy! All done! Pumping!" Grandma says that she's going to be an announcer when she grows up. I figure she'll be a sportscaster for weight lifting competitions--"Krzyzvsky! All done! Pumping! Iron!"
To finish up, here's a little video of her in Stef's boots.
Thursday, January 1, 2009
Five Years Later
Today's our fifth anniversary. It's a bit hard to believe that we've already been married for five years. Sure, all you ten, twenty, and thirty-year veterans laugh. But it's strange to think that I've spent more than one-sixth of my life with Stef. I could write a book from all the experiences we've had together. I'll try to spare you all and make this short.
Flash back to the summer of 2003. I was in Provo, trying to weasel my way through the back door of BYU as a visiting student. Stef also came out for the summer, but didn't necessarily plan on staying any longer. Then we met. I'd like to say that I gallantly rode in on my white horse to save her, but anybody who knows me knows that I don't exactly do "gallant". I'm more of a goofus.
When I first saw her, we didn't really talk. She sat a few rows in front of me in Sunday school, next to a confident guy that had his arm around her. I lamented that all the beautiful girls were already taken. I was happy to find out that the confident guy was her brother, Ryan. She was fair game.
We all lived in the same apartment complex, and the ward was pretty tight. On my way back to my place, Stef passed by with some friends. Just as our eyes met, my feet goofusly met a metal pole lying on the ground, and I tripped. Way to make a good impression, Jesse. But Stef soon fell for me, too, and we got married.
Over the last five years, Stef has endured my bone-headed mistakes, propped me up through college and a full-time job, followed me to a remote island in a strange country, and given birth to two children (one in extremely odd circumstances). No matter how hard I try, I can't think of any strange burdens that she's put upon me. I'm making her be away from family and friends for Thanksgiving, Christmas, Mia's birth, our anniversary, and her birthday. But through all this, she's been nothing short of awesome. I can hardly believe how tough she's been. The only reason I can believe it is because her strength was one of the main reasons I married her.
Stef and I have always said that we know we aren't perfect, but that we are perfect for each other. And I truly believe that. Except that she's a lot closer to perfect than I am. Her many strengths compensate for my many weaknesses. She's helped me grow mentally and spiritually, although her great cooking has, unfortunately, helped me grow physically around my waist.
It shouldn't be as easy as it has been to be away from family and friends. I think that having my best friend and closest family with me has helped. But I realize that I owe her big time for all that she's ever done for me. And I have every day of the rest of my life with her to show her how much she means to me.
Stef, thanks for all that you do. I love you with all my heart. Happy fifth anniversary.
Flash back to the summer of 2003. I was in Provo, trying to weasel my way through the back door of BYU as a visiting student. Stef also came out for the summer, but didn't necessarily plan on staying any longer. Then we met. I'd like to say that I gallantly rode in on my white horse to save her, but anybody who knows me knows that I don't exactly do "gallant". I'm more of a goofus.
When I first saw her, we didn't really talk. She sat a few rows in front of me in Sunday school, next to a confident guy that had his arm around her. I lamented that all the beautiful girls were already taken. I was happy to find out that the confident guy was her brother, Ryan. She was fair game.
We all lived in the same apartment complex, and the ward was pretty tight. On my way back to my place, Stef passed by with some friends. Just as our eyes met, my feet goofusly met a metal pole lying on the ground, and I tripped. Way to make a good impression, Jesse. But Stef soon fell for me, too, and we got married.
Over the last five years, Stef has endured my bone-headed mistakes, propped me up through college and a full-time job, followed me to a remote island in a strange country, and given birth to two children (one in extremely odd circumstances). No matter how hard I try, I can't think of any strange burdens that she's put upon me. I'm making her be away from family and friends for Thanksgiving, Christmas, Mia's birth, our anniversary, and her birthday. But through all this, she's been nothing short of awesome. I can hardly believe how tough she's been. The only reason I can believe it is because her strength was one of the main reasons I married her.
Stef and I have always said that we know we aren't perfect, but that we are perfect for each other. And I truly believe that. Except that she's a lot closer to perfect than I am. Her many strengths compensate for my many weaknesses. She's helped me grow mentally and spiritually, although her great cooking has, unfortunately, helped me grow physically around my waist.
It shouldn't be as easy as it has been to be away from family and friends. I think that having my best friend and closest family with me has helped. But I realize that I owe her big time for all that she's ever done for me. And I have every day of the rest of my life with her to show her how much she means to me.
Stef, thanks for all that you do. I love you with all my heart. Happy fifth anniversary.
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