Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Happy New Year!

Stef and I are enjoying some room-temperature Martinelli's out of plastic dixie cup-sized Winnie the Pooh cups. Ah, Japan.

If I wasn't afraid of ticking off the neighbors, I'd be outside banging pots and pans right now. We stayed up 'til 12 watching LOST, expecting some kind of loud celebration outside. But alas, all our neighbors seem to be asleep. Oh well. Happy New Year, everyone.

PS-Dad, if you're reading this, I ate a spaghetti sandwich today.
PPS-Sorry Mom.

Saturday, December 27, 2008

A little late, but still

With all the commotion, I haven't yet taken the time to write my own thoughts about Mia and how she came to us. It's been almost three weeks since she was born. Dad suggested that I should do it before I forget the feelings that I had that day.

Saturday night, I had the hardest time sleeping. I spent most of the night restless in bed, angry that I wasn't sleeping. In all, I probably got somewhere between two and three hours of sleep Saturday night.

When Stef got up for church early Sunday morning, she asked me how I felt. Since I hadn't slept, I told her that I should probably stay home and rest. While I felt guilty for not going to church (I hadn't missed church since I got to Japan), I just didn't have the energy to make the voyage. So, I stayed home with Kelsey and gave Stef a day to herself.

Right after Stef left, Kelsey was up for the day. Since I was taking care of her, I didn't get to rest during the day. In Imabari, some of the church members gave Stef some interesting Japanese maternity clothing. Sister Ochi gave Stef a ride to the port after church, but stopped at the 100 Yen shop so that Stef could get some goodies to send home to family for Christmas. Stef said that she could walk to the port from the 100 Yen shop, but Sister Ochi had a strong feeling that she shouldn't let her walk. Stef came home at a quarter-to-5 and showed me all the stuff she had picked up in Imabari. She was so glad to have gotten a day to herself for once.

At around 7, we tried to put Kelsey to bed, but she wouldn't have it. Stef was laying in bed, feeling a bit of discomfort, while I tried to soothe Kelsey. I read her various books, rubbed her face, tucked her in, and read more books, but Kelsey seemed distraught and wouldn't go to bed. I closed her door and went back to our room. When 8:30 rolled around and Kelsey still hadn't fallen asleep, something told me to be prepared for a very long night.

Stef's discomfort got worse, and she said that they reminded her of Braxton Hicks contractions, which she shouldn't be having at that stage of the pregnancy. She was very worried, so I gave her a blessing. During the blessing, I wanted to tell her that she would take the baby full-term, but I couldn't bring myself to do it. I felt like I was being told specifically not to say that. I blessed her so that she and the baby inside would both be strong. We decided we'd call the doctor the next morning and travel to Imabari to see him. The contractions went away soon after, and we went to bed at around 8:45.

At 11PM, Stef woke me up and asked me to time something. I was in a deep sleep, so I didn't really have any idea what was going on. I stumbled around to find some kind of clock, and then timed her pains. Stef was very worried, so I said I'd get the island doctor and call a rescue boat to take us to Imabari. When I got to the doctor's house, there was no response for about 3 or 4 minutes. When the doctor finally came to the door, I told her that Stef was having a lot of pain and that we needed to call a boat. She ran to the clinic to get a stethoscope, and then we hurried back to our house.

Stef called her mom and told her what was going on, and asked her to pray for us. I called my mom and did the same. We also called some friends in Imabari to let them know we were coming and might need their help. The doctor called the rescue boat at about 11:40 or so, but said it wouldn't get to our island until about 12:20. Stef's pains got progressively worse. At this point, I had no idea if her pains were labor contractions or some other serious problem. Either way, I knew we had to get to the hospital quickly. The doctor asked me for some string, and I ran upstairs to get a ball of twine that was left by my predecessor. I gave her the twine and she used it to hang an IV for Stef from the curtain rod.

I started packing a backpack with all the stuff we would need for the next day, and decided we'd get Kelsey up when the boat came. I knew that I needed to keep her calm, and that she'd be a source of more stress for Stef if she was upset. My supervisor, Tanago-san, showed up to see if he could help. Stef went into the bathroom while I was scrambling to get everything ready, and then I heard her cry out hauntingly, "Jesse, I'm bleeding!" I raced to the bathroom, where Stef was clearly distraught at the sight of blood. I knew that something was seriously wrong, but really had no idea what it was. I told her that everything was going to be all right and gave her a blessing right there. In the blessing, I said that if the baby did come early that she would know what to do. I blessed her body with strength and blessed the baby so that if she did come she'd be able to be strong and make it to the hospital.

I finished preparations while we waited for the boat to come. At about 12:20, when it finally came, I put on my big backpack, woke Kelsey up, folded her porta-crib up and took her out to the docks, holding the crib in one hand and Kelsey in the other. The paramedics rushed by with a stretcher, and I walked down to the emergency boat. I told Kelsey that we were going to go for a ride in a boat, and that mommy was going to be laying in a bed.

The boat was pretty small--not much bigger than a pleasure boat in America. It had a rectangular cabin with a bench on the left side, and just enough room for a stretcher on the right. Between the bench and the stretcher area, there was about a foot or two of aisle space for the medics to get back and forth. It wasn't much bigger than the inside of an ambulance.

I waited in the boat with Kelsey for what seemed like forever while the medics got Stef in the stretcher. When they finally returned with Stef, I held Kelsey close to my chest and tried to keep her distracted. The island doctor decided to ride with us on the boat. We set off for Imabari, and I overheard the medics say that we were going to arrive at 1:30, which was about 50 minutes later. I repeatedly prayed that Stef and the baby would be okay, and that we'd be able to make it to the hospital.

Stef's pains got progressively worse. Since the medics needed to walk through the small aisle between me and Stef, I couldn't do much to help her but keep Kelsey calm. I tried to hold her hand every now and then and let her know that I was there and that everything would be fine. As the pains got worse, though, Stef started crying out in agony. Kelsey got a bit upset as she saw her mom in pain. I did my best to distract her and assure her that everything would be okay. Kelsey did surprisingly well. I watched every minute tick by on the clock. 1:30 could not come soon enough.

The medics looked nervous, and I'm sure the fact that they spoke no English had something to do with it. Luckily, the doctor spoke English and was able to help Stef and give direction to the medics. She held Stef's hand as the pain worsened. At this point, I still wasn't sure what was going on. I knew that Stef had pain and that she was bleeding, but not much else.

Suddenly, Stef's water broke. I knew that the water breaking meant that the baby would be coming within the next few hours at most, but I hoped that we'd be able to make it to the hospital to deliver the baby. At 12:55, I turned to Kelsey to comfort her as Stef cried out in pain, when, out of the corner of my eye, I saw a baby. I didn't know that the baby was coming, or that Stef was even pushing. She had mentioned that she felt the need to push, but I assumed it would take a while. Little Mia was motionless and purple, laying on Stef's abdomen while the doctor got some equipment ready.

I prayed that Mia would be all right. Stef and I had talked about different scenarios with the birth, and we had said that the worst case would be having the baby on a rescue boat in the middle of the ocean. It turned out that we hadn't even factored pre-term labor into the equation, and Stef was only 26 weeks pregnant. When I looked at Stef to see how she was taking everything, she had a big smile on her face as she looked down at her tiny little baby.

The doctor put a tube in Mia's nose and throat to suction out moisture, and then she started moving. Stef held her close as gently as she could, and the medics got out a an oxygen mask and set it over her head. Her whole little head fit inside the bulging, rounded part of the mask, and Stef held the mask in place. As Mia did her best to breathe, I prayed continually that we'd be able to make it to the hospital to get her the care she needed. Stef talked to Mia and told her to stay strong and hold on, and that we loved her so much. Mia tried to cry, but the only sound her tiny lungs could muster was a kitten-like squeak.

Even though we were a half-hour away from Imabari, and she was tiny, we didn't panic. I had a calm assurance in my heart that everything was going to be all right. Still, I watched every minute tick away until we finally arrived in Imabari. The doctor and our friend were both waiting at the port as we got off the boat. I asked the island doctor if she'd ever delivered a baby, and she answered that she hadn't. The medics also had never delivered a baby. It was a miracle that everything went as well as it did on the boat.

The doctor told me that they planned on taking us all to the hospital in Imabari to make sure that the baby was stable enough to be transported by ambulance to Matsuyama. We traveled together to the hospital in an ambulance. I had to fill out new patient paperwork at the Imabari hospital while they took Mia off into another room. Stef hung around for a while, but then she was transported to the clinic where she had originally planned on having the baby.

The doctors checked Mia and decided that she was strong enough to go in an ambulance to the Ehime Prefectural Hospital's Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (in Matsuyama), which was about an hour and a half away from Imabari. They told me that I should go there as soon as possible. I was willing to go immediately, but our friends were tired and were our only mode of transportation. They told me I should take the first train in the morning, and rest from 4AM to 6:30AM with Stef. I wasn't able to sleep.

I didn't have a jacket, and I was disheveled, but I walked in the cold to the train station to take the first speedy train to Matsuyama. I waited in line for the fast train to come, but it never did. There had been snow at one of the stops, so they canceled the train. I went from being first in line for the fast train to last in line for the slow train. The slow train took over an hour and a half, instead of 35 minutes. I took a taxi to the hospital and went to see Mia. With my Japanese and the doctors' English, we eventually communicated enough to where I understood Mia's condition. I stayed with Mia for a bit, then grabbed a taxi back to the train station.

After taking a fast train back to Imabari (it was back up and running), I ran to the port and hopped on the first of two boats to head back to Uoshima to pick up some stuff we'd need in the next few days. After changing boats in Yuge, the Uoshima ferry arrived at our island at about 4:40. Our grocery delivery came in on the same boat. I ran home, threw some stuff in a suitcase and, with the help of my supervisor, unloaded the groceries into the fridge. I got back on a boat at 5:20 and headed back for Imabari.

In less than twenty four hours, I watched my wife give birth on a small boat in the middle of nowhere, and traveled from Uoshima to Imabari, to Matsuyama, back to Imabari, back to Uoshima, and back again to Imabari. It was, by far, the most eventful day of my life.

At one point, our friend John, who was waiting at the hospital in Imabari with us while we waited to find out if Mia was okay to be transported by ambulance, asked me how I wasn't freaking out. He said that if he were in my shoes, he would be yelling and screaming and demanding answers. I told him that even though everything was extremely new and disorienting, I knew that everything was going to be okay. Throughout all this, I was able to keep my sense of humor. I firmly believe that I drew strength from the many family members who were praying for us back in America.


Thanks to everybody who's prayed for us or sent us good thoughts and vibes. We really appreciate it. I'll give you an in-depth update of our situation in the next couple days.

Friday, December 12, 2008

Update

First, we just want to thank everybody for the kind thoughts, words and prayers. We have felt uplifted.

Mia is getting stronger every day. It's still a long uphill battle, but we feel grateful that she's doing as well as she is. Being 14 weeks premature, her heart, lungs, skin, and other vital organs were all underdeveloped when she was born. Because her heart was underdeveloped, one of its arteries wasn't quite closed up enough to maintain steady blood pressure without heart medication. Her artery has started to close, and they no longer have to give her the heart medicine. She still needs to be sedated to keep her heart rate and blood pressure normal, because she likes to move around so much. She has a bacterial infection that she's receiving treatment for, and she's getting better each day. They had to give her oxygenation and electrical respiratory stimulation so that she could breathe normally. They no longer have to give her the oxygenation. Her jaundiced skin is improving every day.

She was improving so much that they decided to try to give her some of her mom's milk through a feeding tube. She couldn't digest it yet so they had to stop, but they tried again last night. We still haven't talked to the doctors, so we're not sure if she was able to digest it this time.

Stef found an apartment in Matsuyama that's about 20 minutes away from the hospital on foot. We can't move in until December 18th, but we lucked out and got an offer from a Canadian couple to stay in their apartment while they're on vacation. It's about 5 minutes from the hospital, so we're going to stay there until we can switch over to our new apartment.

The new apartment is very expensive, but the church is helping to pay for it since we can't afford it. We hope to only have to be there for three months. It's a one-room apartment that's pretty tiny, but it's furnished and utilities are included. We can even get internet, so Stef and I will be able to Skype once I go back to work on the island. It's a huge blessing.

I went back to the island two days ago to pack some more suitcases. I was worried about having enough vacation time to cover the days I would miss and still have some for early next year (so that Stef wouldn't be alone all week in Matsuyama). My boss told me that they were giving me the rest of December (until January 5th) off, paid--and I didn't have to use my vacation time. When I got home after hearing this, I fell to my knees and wept. I thanked my heavenly father for all the help. I have enough vacation time to take every Monday off for the next few months. I plan on working Tuesday through Friday, then making the 4+ hour trek to Matsuyama to be with Stef for the weekend. I'll go back to Uoshima every Monday in the afternoon.

Before we could leave the clinic where Stef was staying, we had to pay our hospital bills. I wasn't sure what I was paying for, but emptied out our accounts to pay the doctors. When I showed my receipt to the people at the Uoshima Town Hall, they said that I had been wrongly charged for the delivery of the baby. The doctor didn't even deliver the baby, yet I paid him $1600 for delivery alone. I still have to pay the island doctor for the delivery of the baby (only $250, but still, I shouldn't have to double-pay). The island doctor is outraged and is reporting him to some kind of better-business-bureau-type-thing. We're hoping that we will get our money back.

Insurance doesn't cover childbirth in Japan, but the city will pay you a lump sum of cash that usually covers the expenses of childbirth. In Imabari, you can walk out of the city office with cash the day you register the birth, but on my island you have to wait 1-2 months to get it. We'll be a bit strapped for cash until then, so it would be really nice to get that $1600 chunk back. They want Stef to open a bank account, but I don't know how we'll be able to split our money up into two accounts. We have a lot to think about.

I've been filling loads of paperwork out in order to get insurance for little Mia. Since she was so premature, most of the costs will be covered by insurance. We still have some costs, but we're much less worried about being able to afford the medical care than we were at first.

I was told to go the the embassy as soon as I could to register Mia's birth and get her a passport. When I contacted the embassy, they told me that the whole family had to be present, including Mia. There are no exceptions. We won't be able to go until she's healthy enough to leave the hospital. After stressing about it a bit, I've decided that it's not that big of a deal. She was born this year, so we can still claim her on our US taxes even if we don't have a social security number or passport for her. Rest assured that I'll be filing my tax return as soon as possible next year. We'll need that money to be able to afford a family trip to Tokyo or Osaka.

We finally had to buckle down and buy cell phones. We didn't need them on the island, but we'll need them out here. It's free to receive cell phone calls in Japan, and our family plan allows us to call each other whenever we need to for free. Calls to the same network are free from 1AM to 9PM (almost the opposite of the U.S.), but calls to other networks and in-network calls in from 9PM to 1AM cost about 42 cents a minute. I had to purchase the phones with cash--the plans where you get a free phone cost much more per month than the one we signed up for. I spent a total of 3-4 hours (in three separate trips) at the phone store trying to communicate with the salesman (without a translator) and understand what I was buying. I hope I got it right.

It's nice to have phones, even if we just use them to talk to each other and receive calls. My package included $60 of prepaid calls, so I have two SIM cards with different phone numbers. When I need to make calls, I pop in the pre-paid card. Once I'm done calling, I put the regular SIM card in. It's a bit of a hassle, but it will save me a bit of money over the next couple months.

Stef's dad is flying out here tomorrow to be with us and help with Kelsey. We're extremely excited for him to come, even if the apartment will be a bit of a tight fit. Hopefully we'll be able to spend time outside of the house.

I'm going to miss our house on Uoshima ('til I go back). We have a whole lot of food there that needs to come out with us. I'm not sure how I'm going to transport it to Matsuyama without it going bad. We may have to give some of it away and just eat (Ha!) the loss.

Again, thanks to everyone for your support. We feel so blessed to have such wonderful family and friends. It really helps lighten the load.

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Mia Noele Stout

For those who don't know, Stef gave birth to Mia Noele Stout 2 days ago on a rescue boat. She's 14 weeks premature, so we're praying for her to continue developing. For a more detailed account of the situation from Stef's perspective, go to jessenstef.spaces.live.com. We appreciate all the prayers on Mia's and our behalf. We need them. If you click on the slideshow, you can get a better look at the pictures.


Saturday, December 6, 2008

Cool Video

Here's a really cool video. Scott, if you've got my blog address, I'm hoping you'll see this here.

Monday, December 1, 2008

Pictures

I'm posting some pictures from our typical Sunday trip that I wrote about today (look below this post to read it), as well as a few from the Thanksgiving activity at church.

Today our school was invaded by a swarm of flies on the second and third floors. Souji (cleaning) time was spent spraying flies with bug spray and watching hordes of flies spin around on the floor like tops. The bug spray somehow messes with their equilibrium before killing them.


Made with Slideshow Embed Tool

Sunday Trip

Saturday night, we do the ironing, prepare our backpacks with diapers, scriptures, church manuals, and any other things we need to take. We prepare food and put it in the fridge for Sunday's lunch. On Sunday, we get up at 5:45 and get ready for church. We get Kelsey up at around 6:20 or 6:30 and eat breakfast as we make the final preparations. While she's eating, I take her porta-crib down and put it on a fold-up dolly. Once we've eaten and gotten Kelsey ready, we put on our backpacks and run down to the harbor to catch the 7AM ferry to Yuge. I put the porta-crib and dolly in the cargo hold of the ferry while Stef pushes Kelsey's stroller up a ramp and into the boat. Depending on Stef's mood, we either sit in the front of the boat or in the back. Lately, we've sat in the back due to the smoother ride.

For about 40 minutes, we travel northwest through the inland sea, crossing the wakes of gigantic shipping vessels. Kelsey's usually pretty well-behaved on the first boat. She's in a pretty good mood in the morning and enjoys running around from seat to seat and playing with people. We stop at Takaikami, a small island with a population of 50 or so, and another fishing island that has some expensive condos that famous people like to use. The sea is wide, and on a clear winter day, you can see its mountainous borders far in the distance. When we approach Yuge, we ride through a channel with tree-covered hills on both sides. At first, little Japanese houses are sprinkled throughout the trees, but the closer we get to Yuge, things change from quaint to industrious. Old rusted shipping yards, reminiscent of something off Star Wars' planet Tatooine, pop up all around. Arriving at Yuge, we pass under a bridge and head for the dock. Off in the distance, massive ship-building cranes line the shore.

Stef and Kelsey wait with our stuff on a bench under a brown metal arbor while I head up to the port office to buy tickets for our next boat. At 7:55, it shows up and I struggle to hand over our tickets to the boat worker while Stef pushes Kelsey up the ramp and into the boat. I have to lift the dolly and turn it sideways to fit the crib through the door. We usually sit somewhere up front. This boat turns around, goes around one island, and heads back southward, stopping a few times along the way. A few of the stops have big shipyards with gigantic boats in different states of the building process. The hour-long ride takes us along the coast of many different islands in the inland sea. On our right, we see beautiful forested mountains and hills. On our left, nothing but the sea and ships on the horizon.

Kelsey's patience (or perhaps our own) starts to grow thin with about 20 minutes left to go on the second boat. She tells Stef that she has to go to the bathroom. Stef has already taken her to the bathroom twice. It turns out that Kelsey has already filled her diaper this time. Stef changes Kelsey's diaper while we both try to shield Kelsey from sight and smell. Kelsey's got one diaper left after getting a fresh one, and I begin to wonder aloud whether that will be enough for the whole day. Stef assures me that things will be all right (she was right). It's not that I don't trust her motherly instincts. In fact, she's almost always right. It's just that I'm very cautious and always wanting to be prepared. Sometimes I let my good intentions get in the way of being a good husband.

We get to Imabari at 9:00 or so and pull all our stuff off the boat. I hand the boat attendant the receipt portion of our tickets and squeeze out the door with all the stuff. Stef puts Kelsey in the stroller and we head off to church. Typically, we walk straight to the chapel, which takes about 15 minutes. This time, we stop at Imabari Castle to take some pictures. We make it to church at 9:45, and the members are surprised to see us. We usually make it to the chapel by 9:15 or so, so they figured that we had missed our boat or otherwise couldn't come to church.

Kelsey usually naps through the last two hours of church. This time, however, she doesn't go to sleep. She screams and screams until Stef gives in and gets her up. Stef lets her play with the other kids while we attend out classes. We dread the trip home with a napless child.

Church ends, we get home taught by John Scott, and then the Scotts take us back to the port in their car. I buy tickets for the ferry home. Kelsey runs around the waiting lobby while we wait for 2:35 to come around so we can board the boat. Kelsey grows restless, so Stef takes her outside on a walk. The boat lowers its ramp and lets us in for the second half of our trip. It's all the same, but for a few differences. Kelsey is extremely tired and restless, but we've got the whole front section of the boat to ourselves. I see this as a blessing. Kelsey can run around and scream, and it won't bother anybody. To our left, we see the islands. To the right, the sea, with ships on the horizon. The weather has been very favorable, so the ride is smooth. We feel very fortunate.

Stef is surprised when we arrive at Yuge, because the ride somehow seemed shorter this time. We load our stuff off the boat, I hand over my ticket stubs and squeeze out the door. The Uoshima ferry is waiting across the same dock. I roll the crib up to the boat and toss it in the cargo hold. We'd like to lay in the back of the boat, but a group of elderly people are sprawled across the floor, napping. We go up front to find a place to sit. One of my coworkers from the town hall gives Kelsey a mikan (mandarin orange), and hands me another one. Kelsey gets excited and shouts "Ma-tan! Ma-tan!" She loves mikans. Stef peels it for her, but she only takes one bite of each slice and hands the remains to Stef. She's been doing that a lot lately. I finish off the uneaten halves of her mikan slices.

Kelsey is a bit restless, but rather than being cranky, she's wacky. We finally make it to Uoshima at 4:40 or so and head back to the house with all our stuff. Church back home seemed inconvenient sometimes--especially when I had to scrape ice off the windshield during the winter. But compared to this, that was cake. Somehow we find the strength to do this every week. It costs us about $100 a week. But we don't just do it to get it over with. We gladly go. No matter how grueling the trip is, deep down we know that we need this. Somehow, though it is physically draining, it is mentally, emotionally, and spiritually uplifting. I almost didn't go on Sunday, as I got almost no sleep Saturday night. Kelsey certainly would have napped had I stayed at home with her while Stef went to church. But I'm glad I went.